You hooked up, now what?
So you had a really good time this weekend. Maybe you went out, maybe you went to a party but at the end of it all, you hooked up with someone that you shouldn’t have.
Maybe it was a friend or an acquaintance but you did it and now you are wondering about the way forward. Here are a few guiding tips”
1. Keep your expectations in check – When you get intimate with someone, it is easy to feel all warm and fuzzy towards them; feelings that can cloud your judgment. When you meet that person you hooked up with, refrain from kissing or hugging them unless they make it clear that this warm and fuzzy feeling is mutual.
2. Handle the awkwardness correctly – Getting intimate with someone who is just a friend can feel awkward. In this awkwardness, it is easy for someone to send the wrong signals. If you hooked up with someone this weekend, do not handle the awkwardness in ways which will make them hopeful that this will turn into something more. No, do not ask for their number unless you really want this to be something more.
3. Feeling down? – Sometimes after a hook up, you realize that it was a big mistake. Maybe the reality has cleared up in your head and you feel really bad about the hook up. You can’t change what happened. What you can do now is remember exactly what you are feeling right now so that you will not put yourself in similar situations in the future.
4. The silence – Sometimes, after a hook up, the other person may not want to talk about it. This is okay. Do not force it. It means that they are not interested in anything further.
5. Your friends – If you hooked up with someone from your group of friends, you can be sure that the dynamics of the group will change. You need to be ready for jokes or snide remarks from the rest of the group.
6. Your friendship is at risk – Whether or not your friendship survives a moment of deviation all depends on whether or not the both of you are on the same page after the hook up. If one of you gets emotional and the other doesn’t, be prepared to say goodbye to the friendship.
7. If you are interested – If you are interested in turning your hook up into something more, then you have to tell them. But if this is to work, then you need to not hook up with them until you are actually dating. This precaution will make sure that you are not just an option to them.
8. They told everyone about it – Yes, it happens. Your random weekend hook up may have told everyone that would care to listen all about it. This is going to hurt. There is no way of going around that. You can however learn a lesson about it and be careful who get together with in the future.
