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Tips for slay kings roaming the village this Christmas

It is that time of the year when Nairobi’s young men retreat to their parents’ homes for Christmas and New Year celebrations.

The internet is filled with photos of people slaying in their shaggz and most often, the young men too are not left out. They flaunt their Nairobi lifestyle while sharing live videos on social media.

Here is a guide for the young men going to shaggz this festive season;

1. Don’t torment the barman
Your ka-local may not stock your favourite drink for obvious reasons, so do not throw a tantrum saying how you should have carried stock from the city. Settle for what is available and do not announce your presence by seeking special treatment.

2. Cover up
Those vests you like paring up with the checked shorts, do not wear them in front of your mum and her friends. Invest in some decent t-shirts that will not expose your chest irrespective of how civilized your shaggz is.

3. Ditch the car keys
It is the commonest way for Cheers Babas to prove that they have made it. They will literally walk out of their parents’ compound with car keys, never mind the car is parked and they are just walking to meet up a neighbour. Please let your keys stay in your pocket or better yet, leave them in the house when you are not driving out.

4. Language
Forget the ‘you guy, si jana wi kunywaad…village nyaks is the bomb manzee’ vibe. Try and talk like a normal person for once, those ‘you guy’ can be preserved for January when you finally reunite with your species.

5. Make mama proud
There is no need to go home for Christmas only to end up spicing up the village gossip with your drinking escapades. Please, spare your parents the embarrassment. Respect everyone and limit your drinking to ensure your mum gets to share parenting tips with other mothers whose children misbehaved come January.

6. Dont slice the village OGs
Now that your slay queen has also visited her parents, do not take the opportunity to break up village relationships. You definitely have a greater charm compared to the area OGs but allow them to enjoy their only moments of fame with the village beauties.

7. Don’t be mean
It’s a time to give so when your cousins and uncles come asking for some 20 bobs to buy traditional beer, just be their Santa. They can’t definitely break your bank, but by sharing you will have spread some Christmas cheer. So carry that loose change to make someone’s day.