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Away with WhatsApp group admins who are drunk with power!

By Philip Etemesi February 13th, 2019 2 min read

Maybe I am the unruly one but in most of the WhatsApp groups I have ever been in, the admins tend to think they are Matiang’i. They enforce strict rules and regulations on the regular.

If they had the opportunity to hold press conferences, they wouldn’t hesitate to do so. They would face the cameras and be like “Anyone found posting memes in this group shall face the full force of the law. We are not joking with people this time.”

But unlike Matiangi’s strictness, which is usually for the good of the country, the strictness of WhatsApp group admins tends to be annoying and unnecessary. No one will lose a coin if someone makes a joke in a group that is meant for serious discussions. All chatting and no joking makes WhatsApp a dull place.

When I think of some of the greatest dictators to ever live, I think Hitler – the man with the ugly mustache. I think Idi Amin – the man who should have spent more time in the gym than in his limousine. I think Kim Jong – the man who needs to visit a Nairobi barber so that he can get a better haircut.

BOOTED OUT

Then I think of WhatsApp group admins – the people who are so frustrated with their lives that they constantly take out their anger on the 256 or fewer participants in their group.

I have been removed from more WhatsApp groups than I can remember. For real, sometimes I ask myself “Am I the problem?” Then I quickly answer myself “No I am not.” I was never expelled from school. I have also never had an altercation with a boss. I am a fairly disciplined human hence the problem must be the admins.

WhatsApp group admins always feel protective over their little kingdoms. Say something they don’t like and you will be banished from the kingdom to go live in a faraway land. Any slight deviation from the group’s agenda will result in a warning that will remind you of your deputy headteacher back in the day. Some admins never even issue warnings. They just boot you. Not even a notice of eviction? Come on!

REPEAT OFFENDERS

I agree that constant offenders need to be removed but there’s never a need to lay down the law on everyone. WhatsApp group admins need to take it easy. It’s just a group. Anyone can create one.

Just yesterday, I decided to discuss the Grammys in a group that is meant for local music. “Do you guys think Cardi B deserves to win the award for ‘Best Rap Album?’ I asked. The group admin quickly responded with “Toka ama nikutoe. I’ve always insisted that this group is for local music.”

To piss him off, I just posted a link to Porn Hub then left. I am not a very good person am I? Maybe I am not. By the way, I don’t visit Porn Hub. I just discovered it yesterday.

If someone put that last sentence through a lie detector test it would fail. But hey, I am being for real. I only watch TD Jakes and Benny Hinn’s preachings. I also watch that other famous pastor. What’s he called? I forgot.

Anyway, chill out group admins.