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ETEMESI: You don’t have to talk about football if you are not a fan


I have been a football fan since I was a little kid. My initiation into the game happened about 20 years ago during the 1998 World Cup. That’s a long time and with every passing year, I’ve grown to love the game even more.

I never quite understand why some men don’t like football. I understand when women don’t like it but men? Come on?

Football is supposed to be default setting in every man’s DNA. How can you not adore the greatest sport on earth? And the most baffling thing I have ever heard someone say is that they don’t understand why 22 grown men would spend 90 minutes kicking a ball around a field.

PEER PRESSURE

However, I respect people who are not fans of the game and have chosen to stick to their own tastes instead of bowing to peer pressure. I like people who engage in their own activities on a weekend instead of persevering to watch an English Premier League game just because their friends are watching.

You know who I don’t like? I don’t like people who try hard to fit in even when it’s clear that they are not football fans. When a football topic is trending, they feel compelled to chip in even when they have a deficiency of facts.

On Tuesday, a friend of mine came to me, beaming with exuberance.

“Naskia ati Chelsea mumefuta coach wenu,” he said.

“Sisi?” I asked with much surprise.

“Yea…si Mourinho amefutwa. Hujaskia?”

So the guy heard that Mourinho had been sacked but he wasn’t sure which team he coached. He thus assumed that it must be Chelsea, since that’s where Mourinho made a name for himself. He had no idea that Mourinho had been Manchester United’s coach since 2016.

TRENDED FOR HOURS

After Mourinho was sacked, he trended for a number of hours and as expected, dozens of other fake fans coming out of hibernation. You should have seen how they were celebrating and giving weird suggestions on who should be the next coach.

I almost choked on my ugali when one person suggested that Pele should be the next coach because he was a great footballer.

Another person once told me “Napenda huyo owner wa Chelsea sana. Ibrahimovic. Unajua alikua kwa Forbes Magazine? Ako na pesa like nonsense.”

Chelsea’s owner is actually called Abramovich. Ibrahimovic is a football player. You should have seen how serious the guy was, repeating the name Ibrahimovic again and again. I never even corrected him. I have this cheeky cell inside me that makes me enjoy seeing people making fools out of themselves.

A good number of ladies are guilty of being fake fans too. They support a team just because their boyfriends are supporting it. They are usually quick to post and celebrate when the team wins but they have a minuscule comprehension of the game. Their posts get plenty of likes and comments anyway.

Why? Because There are a number of men on social media who have made it their mission to like everything that ladies post. This behavior stems out of thirst really. They hope that one day they will put themselves on the lady’s radar of potential love interests but it never happens. Woiyeee!

Wise humans steer clear of topics they are not familiar with. Wise humans also avoid embarrassing themselves. I’ve said it before and I’ll keep saying it. If you are not a football fan, don’t pretend to be one. Focus on what you like.