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Eight baffling habits of the Nairobi wife

January 10th, 2016 2 min read

By NAIROBI NEWS REPORTER

They say that if men were to write a book on what they know for sure about women, it would be one blank page. The woman is that creature whose goal posts seem like they are constantly shifting.

Still, some women are more baffling than others. Here are habits that the Nairobi wife needs to look into this year:

1. She is volunteer of the year – The Nairobi wife likes to volunteer. She will be organizing her friend’s baby shower, another friend’s wedding and still want to be the treasurer of her chama. The most baffling thing about it is that while she has time for all that, she will not have time for her husband.

2. Back seat driver – The Nairobi wife is respectful enough to let her man drive them around. But she just will not keep quiet. She will want to give all the instructions which can be annoying and distracting for him.

3. Eating your food – Take your wife out for diner and she will order a little food or refuse to order the desert claiming that she is full. Interestingly, when your food comes, she stops feeling so full.

4. She can’t make up her mind – When faced with many choices, the Nairobi woman often just can’t make up her mind. She can’t decide where they should go for lunch, or what to wear. This is a daily struggle for her. She will ask you to make a decision and then sulk because she doesn’t like it.

5. The pillow fetish – Walk into any house that has a wife in Nairobi and there will be at least half a dozen pillows lying around. They will be all over the seats and the beds such that you have to remove them so you can get sitting space. Still, it never seems like she has enough, there is still that one colour or design that she needs to get.

6. Sulking – This one is a classic baffling habit of the Nairobi wife. She will sulk for hours on end but deny, when, asked that something is wrong with her. She expects you to see through the double speak, to read her mind.

7. Suspicion – She is constantly suspicious of the man in her life. Even when he hasn’t given her a reason to. As a result, she is always asking questions and demanding unnecessary details of events.

8. Her shoes! – Every event in a Nairobi wife’s life means that she needs to shop for new shoes. The most baffling thing about it isn’t even how much time she spends before settling on what to buy. It is how she will spend all day complaining how uncomfortable the shoes she chose are.