MISS SPICY: Does your office romance stand a chance?
Would you date a colleague at work? This was the topic of discussion in one of the local clubs during their monthly meetings recently. The debate started on an interesting note as the motion was in favour of office romance and the advantages of dating a co-worker. But how viable is this? I wonder. In most offices a number of people have an ‘office boyfriend/hubby’ or ‘girlfriend/wife’ who enjoy doing little favours for each other. Considering that we spend most of our working hours with this person, dating them appears like the next best thing.
I mean; you know them in and out, you don’t have to pretend in their presence to impress them and best of all, you get to enjoy being around the object of your desire. *Wink wink*. Of course until you find them flirting with that hot new girl in the office or that tall, dark and handsome colleague who’s every girl’s heart-throb. And your cookie crumbles right before your eyes.
But let’s give it the benefit of the doubt though as a number of couples met at their workplaces and are now happily married. At times your job is so time-consuming that the closest you get to a partner is the guy or girl seated next to you in the office. It is a tricky affair both for you as a couple, your co-workers and your employer. Your colleagues might not know how to react around the two of you and could feel uncomfortable
I asked a male colleague if he would date a girl from the office but he said it is too complicated. “If she comes and finds me talking to another girl or hears I have gone for lunch with another girl, our fights will begin. Also, she will want to know about every conversation I have with any female colleague. I will feel suffocated as I know I’m always being watched, either by her or her cronies. It’s too much work, I will pass,” he explains.
I’m not sure dating a co-worker is a very brilliant idea but the heart isn’t always smart. But the truth is consensual relationships happen in the workplace every day. Are you able to see your partner as a co-worker while you are in the office or do you throw your relationship into everyone’s face? This would mean you treat them like you do your other colleagues.
If you chose to go that route, remember to carry your brain with you because it might be bumpier than if your partner was not within your organisation. Date someone at your level. This way no one will judge you for wanting favours if you date your superior or accuse you of taking advantage of your juniors if you chose to date someone below your job grade.
To date successfully, you will require a thick skin because males and females in an office can get very close. Sometimes they will attend departmental parties or trips out of town or those never ending drink-ups. If you aren’t in the same department, you will might not be allowed to join them and there might be that guy or girl who has eyes for your partner.
If you are secure enough in your relationship, chances are high it will work. However, if every member of the opposite sex around your partner causes you to hyperventilate, it could even spell doom for your career.
If you cannot juggle your professional life and your love life, office romance ain’t for you. It can get extremely messy, especially if you break up and you can’t see eye to eye yet you work together. It will leave you feeling like all you need is a transfer to a faraway land.
It will also leave your mutual friends in an awkward place as they don’t know who deserves their loyalty. Or if your now ex decides to date another of your colleagues. Boy, you’ll be left nursing a broken heart! There is too much drama involved.
However, if your company policy allows for co-workers to date and the two of you are mature enough to separate work from your personal relationship and are able to create boundaries, who are we to interfere?