PHOTO | COURTESYPHOTO | COURTESY
By LYDIA MISATI

On this day, a sex robot by the name Samantha was born and we are here lying that the boy child is not prospering?

The American man sat down and realized a side chic is still as mouthy as the main chic or wifey.

A man’s goal unfortunately is to get the cookie and now women I advise be sad there is no Sammy for you.

The only Sammy you knew no longer needs tinder to swipe you, no longer needs a date to win you over; he doesn’t need to waste his time buying you flowers.

Samantha does not need that.

All Samantha needs is some electric power and the mood is set.

LIFE IS SAD AND UNFAIR

Here is the catch, not just any man, though: you’ve got to have some extra bucks to get and keep Samantha.

So to common Brian with normal Kenyan shillings, I know life is sad and unfair and probably Jane, Ndinda and Wambui are giving you a hard time.

Jane is selfish she can’t go home with you if you do not pay her salon girl but she is your style.

Ndinda needs bus fare from Wote and Wambui, well, she also needs to get her nails done in town because “Maragua hawanaga gel na babe pia I need fare”.

Samantha is definitely not for you unless you style up, save up, live in a house that never faces KPLC problems and yeah that token feed needs to be on point otherwise goodbye Samantha.

To the ladies, you are in luck Samantha does not cook yet, so in the meantime, keep bustling and hustling your man but one day OLX might deliver Samantha on his door step and woe unto you dear lonely woman, you will be another incomplete story.

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